It is rare to find a sport where athletic talent can be beaten by mental toughness and courage. In most sports, the most athletic person is the most successful. Not that having skill in wrestling is not important, but I believe wrestlers call upon more than athleticism to succeed. When I step foot on the mat, technique and ability are the least of my worries. I know it is possible to beat someone who is more technically talented than I am -- simply by focusing on the special attributes that I listed above.
I have spent 18 years of my life participating in the sport of wrestling. Throughout those years, there have been times when I thought I was at the top of my game. Fortunately for me, each time that occurred -- it was not long before I realized that I was not. From my youth years up through high school, I accomplished most of my goals. I was successful and had a lot of awards to show for those years. Upon graduating high school, I was very confident with my skills and looked forward to a college career. I decided to attend the University of Wisconsin-La Crosse (UWL). It was there where I finally realized how the sport of wrestling really works.
When I entered my first season of college wrestling, our team at UWL was very competitive. I found myself battling for a starting position that I had previously thought was easily mine. I earned a spot in the lineup and found early success. Toward the middle part of the season, I lost a match I was expected to win. That was the beginning of my maturing process as a wrestler. I was in a slump because my confidence was low from the loss. My coach came up to me and basically said that I could do one of two things: I could realize that I had everything I needed to be a good a wrestler, work on the mental aspects I was struggling with, and finish top-three in Division III as a true freshman at 174 pounds. Or I could continue to be a decent wrestler, knocking off only the wrestlers who were less talented, and never step foot on the podium.
Jason Lulloff, who competes at 184 pounds, is a two-time All-American for the Eagles. After my freshman year, I was definitely mentally tougher than I had ever been before. I thought then that I had this sport figured out -- I had high expectations and a new attitude. During my sophomore year, I realized that my new attitude was great, but it was not great enough. I lost focus at the NCAA Tournament and was pinned in the first round. Devastated with my fourth place finish, I decided I was going to rededicate myself to the sport of wrestling. I trained that summer like I had never done before. My confidence was so high that I was almost cocky, and my mental state was solid. I could not wait for the season to begin. That is when I ran into a new mental challenge.
Only weeks before practice started, I received the results from my MRI. I was so focused on training and becoming mentally tough that I failed to listen to my body. I was having back pains for about two months and finally went to the doctor to get it checked out. I had a severely ruptured disc slightly above my tailbone. Had I gone to the doctor when I first ruptured the disc, I could have avoided surgery. Because I kept training hard, I spread the disc matter into my nerve stem and needed surgery.
When I heard the news, I was devastated. I was told that I was not only out for the season, but I would possibly never wrestle again. At first I wandered around, feeling sorry for myself, but then suddenly the mental toughness kicked in. I decided I would have the surgery and I would return to the mat because I am not an ordinary patient with back problems -- I am a wrestler with a mean mental attitude and a will to win a national championship.
I found a doctor who said that a return to the mat would be extremely difficult, but not impossible, and booked an appointment with him. He performed the surgery and things went well. I spent a lot of time rehabbing the back and am finally at a state where it is possible to wrestle. Every rehab session and every time there was frustration, I can distinctly recall my mind overcoming the body because there was some driving force more powerful than a painful back -- that force is to win a national championship.
Our season at UWL is now underway. I have been participating in all of the practices and so far have had no troubles with my back. I was told that I would never return to 100% of the wrestler I was before surgery, and yet I am extremely confident that this will be my best season yet. I have gained so much more from this injury that I wish everyone could see wrestling as I see it right now.
I have been in the seat where doctors have told me I would be foolish to continue competing. I have stared at my trophies and at the open spot on my desk that I have designated for a national championship trophy. I have contemplated if I was tough enough to overcome the unlikely return to the mat. I spent the last ten months watching our team from the sideline, wondering if I would ever wear a maroon singlet again. The waiting is over; I have overcome another hardship and conquered the odds. I am convinced that I am tougher than ever before. I realize now that I am mentally stronger and more determined to accomplish my goals. Through my struggles, I know now that I am ready for anything that life decides to throw at me. I am really looking forward to the upcoming battles. The excitement in the room has me eager to get this season underway. I am ready. I am back.
Jason Lulloff
Past UW-LaCrosse Entries:
Entry 1 (10/10/05)
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